yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
pop tarts are not kleenex
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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