I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
