i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
so much tequila, so little girl.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
