Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
