no. you can't hotbox the world.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
