areolas are like halos for boobs.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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