belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
