yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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