BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Randomize
