Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
