I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize