please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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