Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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