She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
