i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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