i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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