whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
