Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
