Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Randomize
