My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize
