Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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