i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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