just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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