somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
