so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I think i got beer on your cat.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize