The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
