So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
