Porn is love you can see.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
