the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
