My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
