elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
