We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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