Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
