His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Terrible idea I love it
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
