So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Randomize
