Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
