I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
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