North Korea, Best Korea!
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize