I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize