So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
