She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
