She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
