I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
There r osticjed everywhere
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize