She said her name was "party"
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
