It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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