just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Randomize
