i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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