Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize