What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Randomize
