I feel like I'm in dance class right now
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
