idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
birth control should be required to get into college
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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