Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
another moral hangover. fuck.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
