who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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